I've been at my parents' house for a little over an hour now. They've got a pug. His name is Maximus. He's a sausage with legs. He snorts. I don't understand how he can see in front of him, as his eyes point in different directions. Instead of pointing in parallel lines, they point out at about a 15 to 20 degree angle. It seems that for a couple of inches between his eyes, he should have a blind spot. It's something, perhaps, I should test in my spare time.

For the past hour, he and our little black lab mix Sally have done nothing but wrestle. In the living room. In the sun room. Under my chair as I write on the internet.

Also, he snorts. A lot. I know that's the pot calling the kettle black, but a spade is a spade. And a snort is a snort.

And he's ugly. He took a walk in the Ugly Forest where an Ugly Tree fell on him.

We would shave his ass and make him walk backwards, but we can't tell the difference between his ass and his face.

There's an article in the Daily Post Athenian. No arrests were made locally over the last 24 hours. Due mostly to the cold.

Batman says criminals are a superstitious and cowardly lot. Apparently they don't like the cold, either. Batman should use some of that Mr. Freeze technology. Make it 2 degrees, all the time. He'd have it made.