Potty Problems

We got a notice on our door the other day from the Murfreesboro Water and Sewer Cartel that they'll be doing rehabilitation on the local sewer systems. So I woke up early and got my shower and took my constitutional...to avoid trouble.

The little green paper door hanger warns that in the midst of said rehabilitation (which "consists of washing and televising the main sewer lines") we should keep the commode lids close. We are told this in an ominous warning at the bottom of the note, in bold face and underlined.

It reads: The Department advises customers to keep their commode lid closed on the day of the work. In some instances, while washing main lines, if your plumbing is not properly vented, excess pressure could escape through your toilet bowl. When this occurs, the water in your toilet bowl, and some sewer odor, could be forced out into your bathroom.

Here's my fear:

Remember in the Goonies, when the Goonies have escaped the Fratelli's by going into the tunnel? And they're making noise banging on the pipes in the tunnels they're in, in order to get attention? And in doing so, they cause a buildup of pressure somehow? And their enemy (Troy) is on the commode at the country club, and the pressure buildup shoots him off the crapper into the ceiling tiles?

I'm afraid. So afraid. So very afraid. That it will happen to me, too.

So I did my business and got my shower. Because I don't want to be attacked by the toilet.