Toenails to Neighbors

I decided to get a little bit of shuteye this afternoon, what with the having to work tonight. I've got a knit blanket, and I had a somewhat jagged toenail, apparently.

Well, in my tossings and turnings, I somehow managed to get said toenail caught in the blanket, and before I could extricate myself, I managed to tear most of it off.

But it wasn't one of those where just the uncut 1/16th of an inch of toenail comes off, tearing cleanly like a sheet of paper....it was one of those Southeast Asian Toenail Torture Removals. Complete with crying and confessions. Where not only toenail, but also some of the quick beneath gets torn away. With stringy, gorey, EC Comics gooey tendrils trailing afterward.

Also, we got new downstairs neighbors recently. Like three days ago. And they fight a lot. At least, their average is something like one biggy every day and a half, which is more than anybody else by a longshot.

But it's a different kind of fighting than I'm used to with the neighbors: it's usually unimaginative f-bombs and slamming doors, usually ending with either a cell phone conversation in the space between buildings, or a quick engine startup with peeling tires. Their style is more theatric, complete with crying and melodramatic pronouncements of "I'm leaving you forever" and anguished cries of "Please Don't Go."

And it's kind of sad, and I don't want to think I'm entertained by somebody else's misery...but hey! I'm the one losing sleep up here, so I've got my own misery to deal with.

But it is sad, because I feel bad for the guy crying in the parking lot. But it's also funny in the funereal sense...you know, where you don't really want to laugh, but if you don't you'll be driven insane by it?

They were either in the parking lot or on the sidewalk (judging from the direction of their voices), but the fella'd been crying for like 10 minutes, and it degenerates from crying into a minute long coughing and phlegm-spitting fit.

"Wow," I said to myself. "That's what I call a good cry." Not funny, but it was enough to give me a case of the giggles. That made me get up and come into the living room, just to stop having to hear them.

Ah well. At least if they're going to be all loud and obnoxious, they can do something different. They've got that much going for them.....