One Book Meme

Book Meme

Well, I gots the interweb in the new digs. For the first time in a couple of years, I get to enjoy the wonders that are High Speed Internet.

So. I'll keep this quick, as there's stuff to look at and watch over at Youtube.

Via Dave, we have a book meme:

1. One book that changed your life:

The Quickening by Art Bell.

A close second: The Coming Global Superstorm by Art Bell and Whitley Streiber.

2. One book that you’ve read more than once:

See above.

Also: The Novelization to Porky's 2: the Next Day.

3. One book you’d want on a desert island:

I dunno. I think I'd have to choose the Collected Works of Beverly Cleary.

4. One book that made you laugh:

The Last Commissioner by Fay Vincent.

5. One book that made you cry:

My folks had this giant World Atlas, that was Hardbound, measured 2' by 1 1/2', and weighed approximately 28 pounds. I accidentally whacked myself in the nuts with it once in high school, when looking to settle a bet as it concerned the existence (or non-existence) of "Truth or Consequences, New Mexico." I cried then.

Also, Where the Red Fern Grows. I read that one once every six weeks. To keep myself humble.

6. One book that you wish had been written:

I misread the question. I'm tired. I read it as "the one book you wish you had written...." Here is my answer for it, and the answer to the actual question follows:

The Da Vinci Code. Because with nary so much as a wisp of talent, Dan Brown wrote one of the most fun books I've ever read. The rest of his stuff is absolute shit, and I can't point out what's so different about The Da Vinci Code...it actually kinda bugs me, because I feel like I'm a better writer by a head and a shoulder, yet it's this guy who makes a bajillion point three dollars.

Plus, he probably get to meet Audrey Tautou. That would be awesome.

Now to answer the actual question:

How to Discipline Other People's Children. I wish somebody had written a book that showed me how I might find a way to punish other people's kids without facing "the law."

7. One book that you wish had never been written:

Any of the books where Frank and Joe Hardy met Nancy Drew. I felt like it was an insult to all three characters.

Especially Joe.

8. One book you’re currently reading:

A Simple Plan by Scott Smith

and

Accidental Genius by Marshall Fine. It's about John Cassavetes. Wasn't digging it at first, but it's grown on me....

9. One book you’ve been meaning to read:

Eh. I've got a whole frigging bookshelf of books I've been meaning to read. I just lugged them from one end of the county to the other. There was one day last week where I think I'd have as soon shot them out of a cannon as read any of the heavy-ass things...honestly, why couldn't I have been an illiterate boob?

For lack of a better answer, I'll say You Shall Know Our Velocity by Dave Eggers, because it's the one that's sitting on the top of the pile.....