Monday, December 03, 2007

Stuff I don't want to happen to me. Ever

Stuff I don't want to happen to me. Ever.

Those ever-lovin' scientists have been screwing around with nature again, so worried about whether they could, they didn't stop to think about whether or not they should.

(Guess who watched Jurassic Park this week. God Bless that Ian Malcolm.)

But it seems they've copied the process Jewel Wasps use to zombify cockroaches, thusly turning them into walking incubators for larvae, that burrow around in their innards, until they're ready to be born.

Zombies? I think I could deal with that. Granted, I've never actually fought the undead, but with a shotgun and a katana? I think I'd be alright.

However, I'm not sure all the katanas in the world could stave off wasps that implant their larvae in me.

Want to drive your old pal Tommy insane? Want to turn him into a complete slobbering, gibbering mess? Find a movie that features bugs crawling around under the skin of a person. Or a video of that bug being pulled out from under the skin.

Horror movie, or National Geographic documentary, or 34 second Youtube clip, I cannot handle it. My mind will overload, and shut down. I do not like the idea of things crawling around inside me. Muchly. Muchly, muchly.

Alien? Scariest mother-humping movie ever.

When Khan puts the thing in Chekhov's ear, in Star Trek II? Mortifying.

And in The Mist? Yeah. A guy explodes into a million spiders.

My mind is still screaming.....

So. To wrap this thing up: Science needs to stop. If your first instinct when you hear an idea is to run screaming into the first iron pike you can find? Maybe it's an avenue you guys shouldn't be exploring.


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