Tuesday, April 22, 2008



I don't want to alarm any of my sevens of readers, but there is a small possibility that I am falling apart at the seams. Part of me believes that my corporeal form is just not strong enough to contain the awesomeness held within. Although, I grant you, I'm probably just a klutz.

Starting about two weeks ago...my bathroom door sticks, especially when the room's gotten steamed up from a shower. I wasn't thinking, and opened the door across the big toe of my right foot. Pulled a sizable fraction of that toe's toenail clean off. Not only has it been a test in courage and tenacity pulling a sock on each of these last couple of weeks, but I've seemed to bump that foot, and that toe specifically, approximately 30 times a day.

Then, one day last week, while at work, I'm putting stuff on a bulletin board. To free up hands, I put a piece of paper I'm holding in my mouth. I leave it there long enough to dry and set stronger than most commercial glues. When I pull the piece of paper out of my mouth, I pull a hunk of mouth flesh out with it. Honestly, if I'd had somebody walk up to me and stab me in the neck, I don't know that I'd have bled as much. I guess I'd prefer that nobody stab me on the inside of my mouth.

Then, yesterday, I'm walking out to my truck. It's a nice day--don't know that I could have picked a better week to take a vacation. It being a nice day, and braving fear of ridicule for my messed up big toe, I'm wearing sandals. Well, I'm picking stuff up out of the passenger seat of my truck. I turn, take a step, and a searing pain hits me on the top of my foot, about a quarter of an inch from my second and third toes. A bumblebee was apparently scouting the clover out, and found its way lodged under the webbing of my sandals. That sucked.

Lastly, I've pulled a muscle in my chest. Don't know how, though if I had to guess it came putting stuff up onto my loft yesterday. All I know it's like a frog punch in the chest from Jesus every time I sneeze. Which is a lot.

Pray for me folks....


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