World Title Belt

World Title Belt

In an attempt to alienate all my readers with the exception of the Filthy Hippy and Mr. Crockett, I'm gonna talk about wrestling some more.

I think I would like it very much if I had my very own World Title Belt.

I think one would get a lot of respect carrying a World Title on their shoulder, or wearing it around their waist. A World Championship Title Belt is the perfect accent to any outfit. What brings attention and respect? Necktie? Nope. Cufflinks? Nope. World Championship Title Belt? Definitely.

I don't think you'd get the crap jobs at work, wearing a World Title belt. Who cleans the shitter? Not the guy in the World Title Belt. In fact, I think you'd get promoted. I think you'd be the boss, before long. Wearing the World Title gets the attention from the big boys. Manager Smith? Make way for the World Champine.

And just think if you went into a job interview with the World Title Belt slung over your shoulder. Don't call attention to it. That would be kinda gawdy, to go into an interview with a title belt slung over your shoulder, and then refer to in nonstop. That's a Lex Luger thing to do. You don't want to be Lex Luger, do you?

I think you'd get seated quicker at restaurants. The World Champion doesn't have to wait 20-25 minutes before getting seated for Sunday brunch at Cracker Barrel. The World Champ gets immediate tableage. No wandering around the Old Country Store for the guy wearing the World Title Belt.

Taxi? Say there are two guys at the corner, waiting to go home. One of them is just Joe Schlub, wearing a suit and a tie, carrying a briefcase. The other is dressed exactly the same, except he has A World Title Belt slung over his shoulder, just so the taxi driver can see it. If you're a taxi driver, don't you naturally stop for the World Champion? I mean, that one's a given.

The drawback is fairly obvious. The axiom has long been, in the squared circle, "To Be the Man, you gotta beat The Man."

And if you're carrying a World Title belt on your shoulder, you're obviously The Man.

So you're walking around with a bullseye on your chest. You're a walking target. You gonna have everybody from the ham n' eggers to the cream of the crop wanting to knock you off that little pedestal of yours.

On second thought, since I don't think I could whip butter in a fair fight, it might not be prudent for me to be carrying around the World Championship Title around my waist or on my shoulder.

But the Intercontinental Title? That's something I could get behind....