Happy Birthday, America
Happy Birthday, America
America is 229 years old today, which is 1603, or so, in dog years.
I got America a new sleeping bag, and a propane tank for its Coleman lantern. I expect America to let me use said camping supplies.
The Hot Dog eating contest is being held at Coney Island this afternoon. I've often wondered just how many hot dogs I could eat in that time.
How much money is on the line? Seems like it's not a whole bunch. Something like a grand? I'm going on my own shoddy memory, and I couldn't find any reference in my short search.
Note: ESPN just said champ Kobayashi pulled down a half a million bucks last year. A half a million. Dollars. American. And I work 45-50 hours a week. Damn. Did I get into the wrong business....
ESPN also said that the winner gets a year's supply of hot dogs.
Jeez. I sit down and eat what would be, for me, a year's supply of hot dogs, and what do I get as a prize? A year's supply of hot dogs.
But then, there is a mustard yellow title belt. That would be pretty sweet. I've said before that carrying a title belt on your shoulder instantly garners you respect. Think of how much respect you'd get if you carried a Hot Dog title belt in on your shoulder.
I've wondered before just how many hot dogs I could eat if I were being placed under great stress. Say, terrorists had kidnapped my family, and said they'd execute them unless I won the hot dog eating contest.
I could eat a bunch of Hot Dogs, if lives were on the line.
But upwards of 50?
Could I eat 53 1/2 hot dogs like Takeru Kobayashi? I don't know. I kinda doubt it. A caller on a Jay Mohr guest hosted Jim Rome show had a great line once upon a time, saying he didn't know if he could feed 50 hot dogs through a wood chipper in 12 minutes.
Anyway.
I hope everybody has a happy fourth. Watch some baseball. Eat some barbecue. Give America a Birthday Wedgie.
America is 229 years old today, which is 1603, or so, in dog years.
I got America a new sleeping bag, and a propane tank for its Coleman lantern. I expect America to let me use said camping supplies.
The Hot Dog eating contest is being held at Coney Island this afternoon. I've often wondered just how many hot dogs I could eat in that time.
How much money is on the line? Seems like it's not a whole bunch. Something like a grand? I'm going on my own shoddy memory, and I couldn't find any reference in my short search.
Note: ESPN just said champ Kobayashi pulled down a half a million bucks last year. A half a million. Dollars. American. And I work 45-50 hours a week. Damn. Did I get into the wrong business....
ESPN also said that the winner gets a year's supply of hot dogs.
Jeez. I sit down and eat what would be, for me, a year's supply of hot dogs, and what do I get as a prize? A year's supply of hot dogs.
But then, there is a mustard yellow title belt. That would be pretty sweet. I've said before that carrying a title belt on your shoulder instantly garners you respect. Think of how much respect you'd get if you carried a Hot Dog title belt in on your shoulder.
I've wondered before just how many hot dogs I could eat if I were being placed under great stress. Say, terrorists had kidnapped my family, and said they'd execute them unless I won the hot dog eating contest.
I could eat a bunch of Hot Dogs, if lives were on the line.
But upwards of 50?
Could I eat 53 1/2 hot dogs like Takeru Kobayashi? I don't know. I kinda doubt it. A caller on a Jay Mohr guest hosted Jim Rome show had a great line once upon a time, saying he didn't know if he could feed 50 hot dogs through a wood chipper in 12 minutes.
Anyway.
I hope everybody has a happy fourth. Watch some baseball. Eat some barbecue. Give America a Birthday Wedgie.
posted by Tommy at
10:55
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