Saturday, April 29, 2006

Birthdays, and whatnot

Birthdays, and whatnot

Today is my sister's birthday. She's 25. She's a science teacher. She's a tennis instructor. And I couldn't whip her in a fair fight.

And neither could you, most likely.

She's got a mean right, but a deadly left. She can twist you into any number of submissions. And she was born with an instinctive knowledge of the nerve pressure points on your body--she can stop you without hurting you, but she'll probably choose to hurt you after she's stopped you.

And here's the thing. I said I couldn't whip her in a fair fight?

My only hope is to fight dirty, and that rarely helps.

I warn you...outside of Ric Flair, there is no dirtier player in the game.

So. Wish her Happy Birthday.

But don't sing. They'd have arrested her for what she did to the singing wait staff at O'Charley's, but the authorities knew that no jail would hold her. They knew she'd only cost the taxpayers money and the police their lives.

Plus, she gets to eat at any O'Charley's anywhere. For free. For life.

So she's got that going for her.


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