Monday, January 18, 2010

Text & Messenger Conversation Digest

In a condensed form, this is a digest/highlight version of the text & Blackberry Messenger conversations I had over the last few days:
  • I have seen the movie District 9, but I am welcome to come watch it on Blu-Ray at my buddy Chris's house. I have not yet begun to read the book Tokyo Vice which he lent me before Christmas, but it's next on my list.
  • Apparently, I talked myself into a corner in a conversation with my brother-in-law, simply because I thought both ESPN's Hubert Davis and Lophonso Ellis both look like Klingons. Ellis looks like a high Klingon. As such, I wandered into the land where apparently all black people look like Klingons. I would like to take this opportunity to say that all black people do not look like Klingons. Only some of them.
  • I found an armful of Choose-Your-Own-Adventure books at the Goodwill store one evening. I was pleased. My friend Julie was equally excited. It is a good thing that we are both geeks. Her significant other was less so, saying simply Steven Seagal Lawman > Choose Your Own Adventure books.
  • My sister is largely concerned with whether I have seen the movie The Sandlot. As I have told her several times: I have seen it, and do not see the charm surrounding it, to the point where people include it on their lists of favorite sports/baseball movies. I find the movie largely underwhelming, while respectfully recognizing that a great many people whose opinions I respect are dreadfully wrong about this shitstain of a movie.
  • My sister thinks Denis Leary is creepy looking in the movie The Sandlot, and that he hit the kid with the baseball on purpose. I think Denis Leary is a little creepy looking, in general. Like the Cryptkeeper, before he desicates completely.
  • People are generally unimpressed when you send burps, farts or Meow sounds over the voice message function of Blackberry Messenger.
  • I did not have to drive to Maryville to get toilet paper for a sale at my store. I was muchly relieved, as this would have been roughly 95 miles out of my way, round trip.
  • The score of the Colts/Ravens game, at the time of my text to my boss, was 17-3, and the Ravens were largely defeating themselves in the game. A mutual friend, who is a huge Ravens fan, had gone incommunicado, and we suspected had largely destroyed portions of his house, at the time.
  • My sister beat her record and the game of BrickBreaker. She taunts me.
  • Golden Globes award winners talk too much, according to both Jason & me. I had never before wanted to run Meryl "T-Bone" Streep over with my truck before last night.
  • The general consensus was that Harrison Ford was largely the drunkest man in the room at last night's Golden Globes, with Brendan Fraser coming in second. Kevin Bacon was likely the highest. Kevin Bacon might be a zombie.
  • Helen Mirren, consensus says, is a sexy old broad.
  • Christina Hendricks' boobs are the boobs God looks at up in heaven.
  • Crowd control at the Golden Globes was lacking. Shut the fuck up, if you're in the gallery, and get the hell out of the way, if somebody's trying to get to the stage.
  • The Golden Globes needed more Ricky Gervais.
  • The comic/tragic potential was high when Ricky Gervais slammed Mel Gibson. Think of the headlines if Mel had just come out and started beating the living shit out of Gervais...
  • James Cameron is a blight on humanity, as it that stupid movie, although I respect the honesty of the statement "I gotta pee something fierce."
  • Jason has civility pouring out of ass.
  • Simple question: Could you relax if Touchy-Feely Mike Tyson was standing just behind you?
  • Nobody would bring me Barbecue Potato Chips last night. One particular negative response was met with the accusation: Communist. One reason given for no potato chips: Hitler was eating barbecue potato chips in his bunker, just before he offed himself. This particular conversation devolved into the statement "I have no way to explain the previous statement that does not involve punching you."
  • The six-sided ring for TNA wrestling was retarded, an ill-informed way of trying to make your own recognizable niche. Moving back to the squared-circle, however the change came about, is probably a good move.


Blogger leeann said...

Only the good looking black people resemble Klingons. The rest look like Obama.

12:39 PM  
Blogger punishyourma said...

I can maybe, kinda but only in a little teeny way, sort of see Cameron winning as director because I thought that movie was very, very pretty to watch. But best picture? Give me a break. The script was a flaming pile of petrified dung.

6:19 PM  
Blogger Frank Strovel III said...

You obviously missed Monique's extremely hairy legs at the Golden Globes.

9:12 PM  
Blogger gooseneck said...

You said, "People are generally unimpressed when you send burps, farts or Meow sounds over the voice message function of Blackberry Messenger."

Am I wrong that you DO work in retail, where there is a functioning intercom system?

Trust me, They will be impressed.

9:32 PM  

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