Another Nightmare

I saw this link at Straight White Guy:

Man Kills Python with Fingernail Clippers.

Morgan Mulenga (from Mkushi, don't you know) was relieving himself behind a bush, when he was attacked by a python. He managed to stab it to death with his fingernail clippers.....

You know, I've recently posted my nightmare thoughts on the girl whose allergic reaction to antibiotics caused her skin to slough off, and also a kid who peed bugs a while back....and also even that kid in Wisconsin who got trapped in one of those toy claw game machines....

All are suitable nightmare material....

I don't know where taking a crap behind a tree only to get attacked by a giant, man-eating snake falls on the spectrum of those nightmare seeds.....but I think it's the one that strikes at your most intimate and private of times....going to the potty.

There was an episode of Highway to Heaven, where there's a woman who kept swearing there was a snake living in her toilet, and nobody believed her.....and then Michael Landon's sidekick with the A's cap saw it, too....big friggin snake pops up out of the hole in the bottom of the toilet.

Morgan Mulenga's trial slightly surpasses that particular neurosis of mine on the richter scale of what Tommy thinks about when he can't sleep. I mean, it's one thing to have a snake pop out of the toilet and grab your junk....it's another completely to have one squeeze the crap out of you with your pants around your ankles.

Also, I'm going to have to start carrying my fingernail clippers with me all the time. I sometimes do, but I'm going to have to make sure, now. I mean, all I have with me right now is my billfold and my chapstick. And I don't think that would scare away a python. A bear, maybe. Or perhaps a manticore. But not a python. Not with chapstick.