Saturday, February 10, 2007

Lessons

Lessons

Today, your old pal Big Stupid Tommy's gonna teach you a lesson for free. No charge.

There is a stretch of Highway 411 that passes through the tiny town of Englewood, Tennessee. The speed limit on that stretch of road is 40 miles per hour.

Not 55, as one might think would be so for a big empty stretch of 5-lane highway.

40.

If you don't get somewhere in the neighborhood of that speed, the nice men with blue lights on their cars will pull you over and explain the situation in perhaps more detail.

The only difference is between the lesson I give you, and the lesson they give you, is that mine comes free of charge.

Theirs will cost you upwards of $150.00. I'm talking American money. Not that backwards Australian mess.

So. Slow your shit down. Less'n you want to contribute to the fundraising efforts of the town of Englewood.

They'd only blow the money on booze and candy bars, anyway.

Which is irritating, since that's what I'd had that $150 specifically earmarked for.

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