Wednesday, February 05, 2003

More Random News and Views from your friendly neighborhood Big Stupid Sack of Mostly Water:

I can't recommend Igby Goes Down any higher. I don't use the word "wonderful" enough. This movie is wonderful. Darkly comic. The interplay between Kieran Culkin and Susan Sarandon is tremendous. Amanda Peet is really, really good--and she throws a hell of a punch. The movie combines "Holden Caulfield/Catcher in the Rye" sort of vibe with a really great bizarre sort of humor. A drag queen screaming at a sleeping Igby about Lucky Charms? Comic Gold, my friends. And it's probably the best use of multiple Culkins in a single film that I can remember.


Verbatim, the inventory of the contents of the freezer part of the the fridge in the break room at work, as posted on the door of said freezer, in my absense, Monday, February 3, 2003:

The Contents of this Freezer, 2.3.03

4 Bottles of water (frozen)
1 Bottle of Coca Cola (frozen)
1 Weight Watchers Smart Ones Dinner
1 Healthy Choice Dinner
1 Bag of Fritos
2 Bags (small) of cookies
1 York Peppermint Patty
3 ice trays
2 bags of blue ice
1 package of (unidentified) shredded meat
1 can Minute Maid concentrated Pink Grapefruit Juice

This inventory was the product of one of two things. Either the Loss Prevention Guy had come in and somebody decided to be an asshole and wrote everything in the breakroom freezer down for his benefit...or there was so much shit in the freezer that somebody decided to be an asshole about it and wrote a note for everybody's benefit. Either way, it amounts to somebody feeling like an asshole.

I'd guess the second choice....but we got a lot of people there who carry a major grudge against the Loss Prevention Guy.

Speaking of which, they've locked the personel files in the office. Which is something that most places do, I realize, and something they probably should have a long time ago. But it irks me nonetheless that when I want to give somebody on my staff their review I have to make them wait while my I go hunt up my boss to unlock the cabinet. This is, more or less, a product of the previously mentioned Loss Prevention Guy. This I'm guessing.

Back to the Break Room, Where:

There was also a basket filled with various tupperware containers and baking dishes with a note written in obnoxious block lettering that the contents of the basket must be claimed by Friday of this week, or they would be thrown into the dumpster.

I really wanted to run to my boss with the note, screaming and crying, "Please don't throw away my things! I just can't remember to take them home!" And really make a blubbering mess of myself. And then go home that night without taking anything out of the basket home.


As much as I hate the ESPN's X Games, there's something deep inside me that responds viscerally to snowmobile races and motorcycles jumping a snow ramps and turning flips in the air. But then, I ain't all that evolved. I'm a good sneeze away from Gorillas in the Mist, y'all.

I really got a kick out of this blog: Emily Hates Cigarettes. I don't know this Emily, where she's from or what she's like. But her chronicle of her first two days of trying to quit smoking entertained me for minutes.

Do you know what I had for supper?


Actually, just Tostitos and Salsa.

And I thought I had a snot problem beforehand. The last remnants of my cold(s) came in the form of ridiculous amounts of snot. I was blowing my nose every 4 minutes. But then I ate salsa. And that really opened up the sluices.

I wish I had a satellite dish that picked up baseball from Mexico and Latin America. This waiting two months for a sport I really give a fart about is for the birds. The Nashville Sounds have their schedule up. The Iowa Cubs are in town not once, but twice over the course of the season. And they actually got wise and have scheduled something 14 day games this season. I love Daytime Baseball. One day, I will marry Daytime Baseball.

And on that note, I think it's time to go to bed. Before I hurt myself or somebody else.


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