Amerikaan Futbol...

Amerikaan Futbol...

This sports fandom, between the Cubs and Titans, just ain't what it's cracked up to be, sometimes. What starts as a diversion becomes an odd all-or-nothing emotional investment in men who get paid more in a couple years than I'll probably hope to ever see in my lifetime to hold on to a football...

Makes it all the more gut wrenching when they fail to do just that.

Easy for me to say, I realize, owing to that I've never had Ray Lewis running at me full-tilt with malice and mayhem on his personal agenda.

Well, there was that one time. There was a misunderstanding over a joke about extracurricular activities in Atlanta and a baloney sandwich. Several broken ribs and a severe aversion to concussions later, I can admit that I was fully in the wrong.

Still, in every cloud there is a silver lining: I never knew just how much I enjoyed applesauce.

But I digress.

I suppose one day sports fandom will pay off. To this point, the closest I've gotten to what I'd figure is ultimate exultation is learning from a friend who'd seen the show that Ricky Steamboat had beaten Randy Savage at Wrestlemania III, several months after Savage had crushed Steamboat's windpipe.

They're not going to tell me that football is fake after the fact, are they?